Thursday, December 30, 2004

dis few daex kinda busy.. been g0in 0ut.. if n0t ishx stay at h0me t0 watch ‘w0 he jiang shi y0u ge yue hui 3’.. hmMmx.. yest went t0 watch kungfu.. its a nice n farni sh0w.. w0rth watchin.. hahax.. but its damn lame l0rx.. l0lx.. will luff till st0mach pain 0ne.. hahax.. den went arnd t0 sh0p den g0 h0me lerx.. century n tamp mall n0thin t0 sh0p 0ne.. s’p0re sh0 small.. sh0 little place t0 g0.. den last nite watch ‘w0 he jiang shi y0u ge yue hui 3’.. till kinda late.. den ivan kall i reject his kall.. den use hse f0ne kall him back.. reply henry sms t0o.. haix.. was kinda sh0cked dat henry was downstair m0i hse.. den ask him he find mie izzit.. he sae n0thin.. jux downstair c0s dats e last tym where he sent mie h0me.. im s0rri.. but i ken0t accept u n return t0 u.. i cant bluff m0iself dat i dun lyk ‘him’.. last tym i ren sh0 much.. u vent ur anger at mie all dat i 0s0 take it lerx.. in e end u still leave mie.. den n0w.. wen i m0ve 0n 0readi.. u den regret wat u did.. but i dun blame u.. c0s at least u realise ur mistake.. but n0w.. m0i hart ishx wif ‘him’.. i dun wanna b back by ur side lerx.. c0s im scared e hist0ry might repeat again.. i n0e i lidat sae veri unfair t0 u.. im s0rri.. veri s0rri... haix.. im veri t0uched wif wat u sae.. reali veri t0uched.. c0s its e first tym sum0ne eva t0ld mie dat.. but deep in m0i hart.. i wish it was ‘him’ hu tell mie all dis.. h0pe we r still frenx.. n last 0f all.. im veri veri sorri..

t0dae sh0 earli wake up.. 11+am m0i sis came int0 m0i r0om n kp 0readi.. c0s we g0in t0 brin 0ur parents 0ut t0 buy their new yr cl0thes.. went t0 chinat0wn.. well.. damn b0rin.. l0lx.. but b0 bian.. brin dem g0 0rchard dis kind 0f area dey dun lyk.. hmMmx.. n we kip 0n eatin!! m0i dad ishx lidat.. dunn0 y evritym g0 0ut wif him sure eat eat eat 0ne.. l0lx.. den tink al0t al0t abt e past.. mani mem0riex came back int0 m0i head.. i feel veri pain inside.. but i nvr cry.. c0s i cant cry infr0nt 0f m0i parents.. n im veri tired 0f cryin lerx.. sumtymx i reali cry till n0 tearx.. but cryin ishx m0i 0nli way 0f releasin m0i sadness.. haix.. mish ‘him’ as usual.. t0ld k0on.. n im veri s0rri.. but i disapp0int her.. i n0e she wan mie t0 f0rget ‘him’.. but evritym i 0nli n0e h0w t0 disapp0int her.. haix.. she wei lerx w0 fu chu s0 much.. w0rri sh0 much.. pray f0r mie.. listen t0 mie.. c mie cry.. evritym im sad she will b e first t0 gimme a helpin hand.. in e end.... i feel damn useless.. reali veri useless.. evritym i disapp0int her i feel s0 helpless inside 0f mie.. but all i ken sae ishx s0rri.. i n0e she wanna c mie m0vin 0n.. n0t 0waex tellin her s0rri.. but.. i reali cant m0ve 0n.. even if sum0ne ishx betta dan ‘him’ mani tymx.. ‘he’ ishx still in m0i hart.. i wish ‘he’ has nvr leave.. evritym i hav been tinkin.. y d0es he hurt mie sh0 much but he still ken live life sh0 happily? while im endurin his pain? i n0e he ishx n0t w0rth wat i did.. all dis i n0e.. but u ppl n0e mie.. 0nce im in dis situati0n.. i will gib in all i ken.. even if dere ishx n0 return frm him.. i hate moiself.. i reali hate moiself!!! i reali wish t0 jux jump d0wn frm e buildin n end all dis.. but sumtin ishx preventin mie frm d0in it.. i dun wan m0i family n frenx t0 suffer frm e pain dat i cause t0 dem.. im in a darkness.. hu ken lead mie 0ut 0f here? n im cryin.. hu ken wipe awae e tearx dat has fallen frm m0i eyes? e pers0n hu ken st0p mie frm cryin n lead mie 0ut 0f darkness.. ishx e pers0n hu ishx makin mie cry n leavin mie in darkness.............

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